RE 78: What I've learned about the Stigma Surrounding Alcohol

Annie has been sober for 2 years. She never thought twice about her drinking because she didn’t know enough about it. Annie started journaling about her drinking habits as an exploration in March of 2013 which enabled her to stop drinking in December of 2013. Annie is from Colorado and works in marketing. She is married with children and loves the outdoors (hiking, skiing).

[ 02:08 ] When did your Elevator hit its bottom? When did you finally decide to stop drinking?

Annie was living in London when her Elevator hit bottom the first time. Annie and her family were going to the London Eye (an amusement park) and she had decided it was a good idea to bring in two large beers, packed in her purse, to sip on. “I dropped my purse and the beers exploded, spraying beer all over my children and my parents.” "I had a 'What the fuck has happened, what am I doing?' moment right then.” On another trip, Annie was traveling all over the world for work, she comments, “You’d take off on the airplane and get drunk, and then I’d justify having drinks in the lounge… I was pretty much existing on coffee and alcohol. I realized that I had to get back into regular mommy life. I just remember sitting there thinking, Whoa, what is this?'"

[ 04:27 ] Talk to me about your drinking habits?

“The plans are my worst enemy! As soon as you start to try to stop something, it becomes even more tempting. It’s like putting yourself on a diet.” Annie had all sorts of ideas/plans: no drinking until 5pm, only having 2 glasses of wine (but after two she didn’t care how many more she consumed), trying to have a sober day... “I remember finding an excuse every single day to drink. I was driving myself further and further into separateness and defensiveness.”

[ 06:31 ] How did you make the change (into sobriety)?

“I didn’t seek help. I just didn’t know any better. I didn’t know what I didn’t know (referring to all the resources out there). I had a different kind of 'talking-to' with myself one day in the Heathrow airport, I decided to give myself permission to write about this, to explore this in a mindful way." Dr. John Sarno’s work really inspired Annie to dive deeper into understanding her need to drink.

[ 09:59 ] What was it like?

Annie’s research took her on a journey for 8-9 months. “I was still drinking during the research, but by the time I stopped, I had made peace with it. On an emotional level, I felt free.” “It was like being sick to save my life for about a month. There were a lot of tears and a lot of laughter and joy.”

[ 13:23 ] This Naked Mind - Control Alcohol by Annie Grace

Paul lets the Cat out of the Bag (meow!) - Annie Grace wrote, “This Naked Mind - Control Alcohol”. It is a MUST read for recovery.

[ 14:40 ] What was the push back like after writing a book that wasn’t based on AA?

“I questioned the word 'alcoholic' because in my research, any organism can become addicted to something. I took issue with this because we are all built with flesh, blood, bones, and cells… We are all the same. The word 'alcoholic' is really a solace for people.”

[ 20:12 ] Annie talks about the Hedonic Threshold and the fact that alcohol is just plain addictive.

[ 25:17 ] What is the difference between the conscious and the unconscious mind?

Annie speaks wholeheartedly about protecting her unconscious mind and understanding the need to have self-compassion, self-worth and acceptance in this process.

[ 31:15 ] Annie’s Projects

This Naked Mind - Control Alcohol is available on Amazon. She is also working on a second book that focuses on the first few years of her sobriety, highlighting techniques she used to maintain a clean and naked mind and keep the garbage out. Annie is also putting together a video-based course complete with worksheets and exercises that she hopes to launch this Fall (2016).

 

[ 32:12 ] Rapid Fire Round What was your worst memory from drinking? [ 32:20 ] “Not having the memories. I don’t remember moving day and moving days are supposed to be special. I lost that day.” Did you ever have an “oh-shit” moment? [ 32:52 ] “I had a lot of those. They were all at 3AM when I'd wake up and couldn’t remember how much I’d drank the night before.” What’s your plan in sobriety moving forward? [ 33:10 ] “Continuously protecting my unconscious mind, continuously asking “why” and “what.” What is your favorite resource in recovery? [ 33:33 ] “Ten minutes of watching my breath every single day.” What’s the best advice you’ve ever received (on sobriety)? [ 34:11 ] “It’s more about living than it is about sobriety. Living alcohol free and living your life.” What parting piece of guidance can you give to our listeners who are in recovery or thinking about quitting drinking? [ 34:56 ] “Right now, in this moment, FORGIVE YOURSELF. Realize that you’ve been caught in an addictive trap. The sooner you can get to a place of acceptance and love yourself through this, opens the journey to becoming sober.”

 

QUOTABLES

“There are so many people who are heavy drinkers, who don’t believe they are alcoholics, because we use it (the word ‘alcoholic’) as a shield to defend our addiction.” - Annie Grace

“Shame, guilt and self-loathing just don’t work. We need understanding, acceptance and love.” - Annie Grace

“Acceptance is the answer.” - Paul

“As soon as you start to try to stop something, it becomes even more tempting. It’s like putting yourself on a diet.” - Annie Grace

Resources Mentioned in this Episode

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This Naked Mind - Control Alcohol

Dr. John Sarno’s work

 

 

“We took the elevator down, we gotta take the stairs back up, we can do this!”

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