About the Episode
Around 20% of marriages are sexless. That is, the couple has sexual activity ten or fewer times per year. About ten years ago, a New York Times study indicated that 15% of couples haven’t had sex in at least six months.
Sexlessness in a marriage can be a source of deep pain—and if often reflects pain as well.
Today we’re going to talk about sexless marriages and what you can do about it if you’re in one.
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From the Bible
What does God have to say about sexless marriages?
"The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control." 1 Corinthians 7:3-5
Song of Songs
"Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." Galatians 6:2
"You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love." Galatians 5:13
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others." Philippians 2:3-4
"That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh." Genesis 2:24
"'Haven’t you read,' he replied, 'that at the beginning the Creator "made them male and female," and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.'" Matthew 19:4-6
How beautiful you are and how pleasing, my love, with your delights! - Song of Songs 7:6
Resources
Unlock Your Libido: 52-Week Sex Drive Transformation by Bonny Logsdon Burns
Intimacy Revealed: 52 Devotions to Enhance Sex in Marriage by J. Parker
Why Knowing Your Low Drive Spouse's Love Language Is Important - Bonny's OysterBed7
Move Mismatched Sex Drives Toward Better - Bonny's OysterBed7
Ways to Align Mismatched Sex Drives - Bonny's Oysterbed7 @Messy Marriage
Helping Mismatched Sex Drives Become More Matched - Bonny's OysterBed7
Why Sex? - Bonny's OysterBed7
How to Arouse Sexual Desire Through Emotional Connection - Bonny's OysterBed7
Eliminate These to Help Grow Mismatched Sex Drives - Bonny's OysterBed7
Dear Wife, You Deserve a Great Sex Life Too - Calm.Healthy.Sexy
Just Because He Stopped Asking Doesn’t Mean He Stopped Wanting - Hot, Holy & Humorous
Is Refusing Sex in Marriage a Sin? - Hot, Holy & Humorous
Q&A with J: “What If Neither of Us Desires Sex?” - Hot, Holy & Humorous
Q&A with J: I’m in a Sexless Marriage - Hot, Holy & Humorous
Q&A with J: “My Sexless Marriage Is Making Me Lose My Faith in God” - Hot, Holy & Humorous
Is the Church Failing Sexless Marriages? - Hot, Holy & Humorous
Q&A with J: “What Can I Do About My Sexless Marriage?” Part 1 - Hot, Holy & Humorous
Q&A with J: How Do I Write a Post that Helps Sexless Marriages?
Q&A with J: “What Can I Do About My Sexless Marriage?” Part 2 - Hot, Holy & Humorous
A Prayer for Sexless Marriages - Hot, Holy & Humorous
Q&A with J: “What Can I Do About My Sexless Marriage?” Part 3 - Hot, Holy & Humorous
Q&A with J: “What Can I Do About My Sexless Marriage?” Part 4 - Hot, Holy & Humorous
How the Sexually Rejected Spouse Feels - Hot, Holy & Humorous
How the Sexually Disinterested Spouse Feels - Hot, Holy & Humorous
A Moment of Hard Truth - The Forgiven Wife
Leaving a Sexless Marriage - The Forgiven Wife
Living in a Nearly Sexless Marriage - The Forgiven Wife
Is a Sexless Marriage a Loveless Marriage? - The Forgiven Wife
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