Fear and Failure
We all have thoughts around fear and failure that keep us stuck.
All fear is rooted in a past experience…
Other than the startling reflex, we are born largely fearless.
Failure is not in our vocabulary and we are confident we can become and achieve whatever we want -
Astronaut Wonder Woman
What happens to detail us from these positive beliefs?
Here is a definition of fear -
"Fear is an unpleasant emotion based on the belief that there is danger, pain or a threat that is imminent... "
Emotion won't kill you, even the most negative ones...
How will you overcome the WORST emotion you might feel?
Emotions aren’t real. The feeling feels real, but most fear is not actually happening in the present moment.
Close your eyes and imagine your life without fear. What action steps would you take? What would you do differently?
Real fears - fire, physical threat. True danger or threat and happening now.
What are your fears? Be honest, take an inventory and write them down. Get out a piece of paper and let’s journal and write out our fears.
What fears do you have in your business?
Rejection Hearing No Social Shame Haters and Trolls Failure
What is REALLY a rejection of you? What really has to do with you?
What fears do you have in your life? Relationships?
When you feel fear, ask yourself -
What is the emotion I am feeling?
Is it real? OR am I asking “what if….?”
What if it did happen? What’s the worst that could happen?
On a scale of 1-10, how does this emotion feel, with a 10 being the worst feeling.
Will this feeling, even as a 10, kill me? Can I survive it?
New Mantra
WHATEVER HAPPENS TO ME, GIVEN ANY SITUATION, I CAN HANDLE IT!
What if we make this slight shift in how we SEE and handle fear?
What if we took the time to evaluate what is really going on; what is true and not true, and, the story we make up about it?
We are going to re-educate our minds to shift from thinking that we must overcome FEAR, and realize that fear is a fact of life, and NOT a barrier to our success.
When you take a chance, and get bold, and take steps despite your fears, you begin to change the way you experience fear, and the hold that it has on you.
3 Levels of Fear
Level 1 - facts of life fears and action fears
Fact of life fears are things like aging, children leaving home, death and dying, natural disasters. They are things that happen, and are often inevitable and out of our control.
Level 2 - Action fears are those things we must take action on in order to experience - rejection, success, failure, disapproval, loss of self image.
We must DO something in order to actually experience this fear as a reality, and not just think it will happen.
Level 3 fear is one thing - I won’t be able to Handle it!
And, when you break it down, all fears come down to this ONE thing - I won’t be able to handle it!
I won’t be able to handle rejection!
I won’t be able to handle the death of a loved one!
I won’t be able to handle it if someone says something negative about me and my business.
Who knows why we stop trusting ourselves, but often we do.
Let’s just change that from here going forward.
New Mantra - Whatever happens to me, in any situation, I can handle it!
IF we wait for our fears to go away before we take action, we will never advance, because fear does not go away, necessarily.
5 Truths About Fears
Truth #1 - Some degree of Fear will never go away, even as I am growing and moving forward.
Truth #2 - The only way to get rid of the fear of something is to just go out and do it! Take action.
Truth #3 The only way to feel better about myself is to go out and do it!
Truth #4 - Not only will I experience fear whenever I do something outside of my comfort zone, so does everyone else! Discomfort is okay. In fact, it is necessary for success.
Truth #5 - Pushing through fear is less frightening than living with the underlying fear that comes from feeling helpless!
Shifting from Pain to Power
Fear is not the problem. How we feel and hold onto fear is.
Shift your self talk. What are you unable to do vs unwilling to do?
Change - I can’t to I won’t
Change - I should to I could
Change - it’s not my fault to I take responsibility
Change - life’s a struggle to life’s an adventure
Change - it’s terrible to it’s a learning experience
Rate each fear on a scale of 1 to 10 and work to move toward a 10 each day.
Each day, do something that you once viewed as scary, or risky. Take small baby steps and see how you feel!
Get my confidence series - ConfidenceDecoded.com
Let’s dig in more deeply to what is really holding you back and keeping you stuck.
It’s not lack of knowledge about your business; your relationships, etc.
It’s fear and other emotions.
