For practical advice on the seven sexy habits that drive men wild, Marni welcomes the best-selling author of Project Everlasting, and creator of the Cracking the Man Code seminar, Matt Boggs into the den. Matt helps millions of people around the world understand the hearts and minds of the opposite sex and how they can attract the relationship they desire. He is a sought after dating and relationship expert. He's been featured on the Today Show, CNN, Headline News, and Oprah & Friends.
Key takeaways from this episode:
What flirting is and isn’t What men need from a woman Strategies for showing a guy you are interested without going overboard How to express your sexual energy How to say no to a guy if you are not interested in him
Driving Men Wild in the Time of #Metoo [2:36]
All of Matt's work revolves around supporting and empowering women in their love life. During the time of #Metoo, men have been shifting their behavior in how much attraction they are willing to show especially in certain environments. There has been a pullback from men when it comes to making the first move.
Are men afraid of saying the wrong thing or doing the wrong thing? Marni says ‘Yes’. Therefore, women need to make it clear they are interested so guys know it's ok to approach us and show us they are interested.
Women sometimes falsely think that men have all the power in a relationship. The truth is the woman has way more power and influence in the dating, courting, and attraction phase of the relationship. Throughout history, in relationships where there is a ton of chemistry and connection it is the woman who sends the signal and chooses the man.
To get a guy’s attention, making eye contact and smiling may not be enough. If you want to be bold beckon him over with your finger. You can be proactive AND feminine.
The Over/ Under Challenge [10:57]
One of the biggest challenges in dating is when you feel attraction for another person you either overcompensate, or over demonstrate attraction for them. This is when a woman gushes over a man which is a total turn off. Men value what they earn so when a woman gushes too early it triggers something in a guy that makes them think the woman does it for everyone and therefore they are not special. It deflates the attraction.
The under is toxic to the attraction also. It's when a woman plays the ice queen as if they are not interested at all. Older and more successful women are more likely to act reserved. They may be afraid of getting hurt or they may not want to lead a guy on.
For a man to move things forward, a woman needs to demonstrate she is attracted to him. A woman's willingness to share her sexual attraction for a man is paramount. Sex is the main thing that differentiates a friendship from a romantic partnership.
Flirting doesn't mean you have to have sex with a man. Flirting is not slutty. Flirting is not manipulating. Flirting is recognizing that you are ready for a romantic partner.
In the dating game everyone is playing the same game. Rejection shouldn't stop you from playing the dating game nor should it devastate you.
The 7 Sexy Habits that Drive a Guy Wild [20:44]
Matt shares seven tactics you can use to express your sexual energy that men love. Expressing these seven things will boost a man’s attraction and desire for you.
Walking with a sway in your hips. Eat more sensually. Whisper in his ear. The way you sing to yourself. The way you dance. The way you attack your man in bed. The way you go for your dreams.
A woman in joy is highly attractive to a man.
Barriers to Implementing Sexy Strategies [30:59]
The number one barrier to implementing these strategies is feeling like you are leading a guy on and then that you may be disappointing or rejecting him.
When you reject a man it's not devastating to him. You are not responsible for his emotions or experience. You are simply freeing him up to find someone who is right for him. It's ok that it is just not a match. If a man approaches you and you are not interested, Matt recommends using this response “I'm flattered and I honor your courage. Unfortunately, I'm not available and I wish you the best of luck in your search for love."
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