What happens when we confuse validation for love?
Is that opportunity really worth accepting?
Is that relationship really worth fighting for?
Is that friendship really worth the effort?
I ask these questions because it’s important to reflect on WHO is the person we become in the pursuit of approval and validation. Are we giving up parts of ourselves in this pursuit? Can we even recognize the person we’re becoming?
Nothing is worth abandoning ourselves for. We just need to be brave enough to know that we can pave a path that allows us to be who we yearn to be, while making room for who we already are.
I recently shared a poem I wrote on Instagram (shared below), inspired by a conversation that we had in my online community, The Lighthouse Collective, about how easy it is to confuse validation for love, Or the number of followers we have with the impact we’re creating in the world.
At the beginning of my business, I was making many concessions in who I truly am. It’s the moment I embraced my full self that I became empowered to show up even more as myself.
If you want to hear more on this topic, check out this week’s podcast episode.
On the episode, I cover:
Micro-moments where we give up parts of ourselves Why we conform to make others feel comfortable How the clothing we choose to wear is a reflection of who we are
Here is the poem I wrote and shared if you’re interested.
when I confuse validation
for love
who do I become
in the pursuit of it?
how do I bend + contort
shapeshift + hide
betray myself
to stay inside their zone of comfort
how do I give up approval
for self-actualization
how do I reclaim myself
the parts left behind
how do I appreciate
the complexities that make up who I am
maybe it's realizing the cost
of validation + approval
are too expensive
when it comes at my expense
maybe its realizing
love will never require me
to leave myself behind
especially when I realize
how profound
being me truly is
how I lose out
how the world loses out
how love loses out
when I believe anything less
I believe in you.
And remember the world truly does lose out, when you believe you are anything less than profound.
Lana
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If you are interested in working 1-on-1 with me to help grow your business, I would love to connect with you on a free strategy call here. Learn more about my coaching services here.
Check out The Lighthouse Collective if you enjoy these conversations. It’s a community for socially and spiritually conscious entrepreneurs building a better world together. We talk about topics like this in even more interactive and supportive ways!
