Emperors and fishmongers. The opposite end of the social spectrum, but in Japan, I discovered the levels of formality in meetings was unnervingly similar.
Formality in Japan is linked very closely to what is perceived as being polite. European countries may feel more familiar with Japanese style formality, but for countries like the US, Australia, Canada etc., this level of formality is not the usual. There is a sense of formality here in Japan that is unexpected and sometimes hard to fathom for most foreigners.
The most formal meeting I have ever attended in Japan was when I met the current Emperor in his palace. When every new Ambassador arrives in Japan, they go to the palace to present their credentials. This was the case with Australian Ambassador John McCarthy, while I was Country Head for Austrade at the Embassy. The Ambassadors don’t go to the palace on their own. They have their entourage of senior officials from the Embassy with them and I was in that group. There is a special waiting room for you at Tokyo Station and then you are taken by horse drawn carriage with a mounted escort to the palace. A senior Japanese Cabinet member attends you, in our case, the Minister of State for Financial Services was Heizo Takenaka.
There are numerous points of protocol when greeting the Emperor – how you walk, stand, move, speak, sit etc. Formal beyond words is how I would describe the atmosphere. The second most formal meeting I have been to in Japan was with some fishmongers in Osaka. I was introducing Australian Ambassador Dr. Ashton Calvert to various importers dealing with Australia. This seafood business was a large one and a big customer of Australian produce.
They had the entire echelon of senior management turn out for the meeting with the Ambassador, it was a very stiff affair, a complete ceremony in itself. The formality was quite breathtaking. I never expected that fishmongers could be that formal, but it was a very serious affair, because of the “above God” status of the visiting Ambassador.
There are levels of politeness here with the accompanying formality. Even simple things like how you sit. I had an embarrassing experience when I was attending a senior Australian government official making the rounds of calls in Osaka. The Governor of Osaka was unavailable that day for the meeting, so we met the Vice-Governor.
Picture this scene. The Vice Governor is sitting ramrod straight in his chair, with a 10 centimeter gap between his spine and the back of the chair. Roman patrician style – very formal and upright. My Aussie VIP visitor by contrast, was sitting there with his legs kicked out in front of him, lounging back in his chair, like he was on his couch at home watching the footy. The contrast in informality and formality was stunning. The formality-politeness construct comes straight into play here. Is lounging around in a formal meeting polite in a Japanese context? Was my VIP showing any respect for the Vice-Governor? I don’t think so. After the meeting, I tried to breach the subject of required formality in Japan with my visitor in a subtle way, but I failed. The cognition gap was too big to straddle.
When we are in business, always think that Japan is more formal. When you go into the meeting room, there are these massive big chairs with solid wooden arm rests. These are big units and must weight about 50 kilos. They are also set at quite long distances across the room, so you are quite separated from the other side. It is very, very hard to build up any rapport when you are sitting that far apart in such a formal atmosphere.
If you are a training business like we are, you want to show things to the buyer. Well you just can’t do it at that distance, so you have to get up and go sit closer. Of course you have to apologise for breaking protocol to do that, but otherwise you have no chance of introducing your solution with any impact. Now a Japanese visitor is unlikely to ever attempt to alter the seating arrangement, which is why being a foreigner is an advantage sometimes in business in Japan.
We can break through the formality, but you have to know when it is appropriate and when it is not. We are dealing with Presidents of companies or very senior people and it is great chance to go straight to the top and get them interested in what we can do for them. In the typical Japanese setting among Japanese, they are going to find that hard to do, because of all the formality attached to the meeting.
We are in this room as a sign of respect. They have lots of other meeting rooms which are a lot less formal and where you can do business across the table more easily. The formality of the meeting room reflects the degree of politeness being shown to the visitor. Because of your rank you go into the big, formal, impersonal, almost impossible to do any business meeting room But it is a strong sign of polite respect and we should be extremely appreciative of that indicator.
So what happens when we flip it around and you are receiving visitors – what degree of respect are you showing them? Do you walk them out to the elevators? In Japan that is part of being polite, showing respect. Now in some cases you may not rank that degree of respect, so it is sayonara at the door.
Japan’s politeness is linked to formality and thoughtfulness. Japanese are very, very thoughtful. Australia, where I grew up, is so much more easygoing, informal and casual, so sometimes it is hard to get your head around Japanese formality. The thoughtfulness thing is also surprising too.
As an example, my wife’s friend invited us to the wedding of her daughter. The family is super wealthy and they could have had an extravaganza of a wedding, inviting all the heavy hitter business contacts as well and making it a big affair. Instead, it was about 100 people and they were all close friends and relatives. My wife who is Japanese surmised that the reason we were invited was because her friend wanted to introduce us to our own neighbor.
Our neighbor, like my wife’s friend was in the Takarazuka troupe, which is super famous here in Japan and they are all female entertainers, acting, singing and dancing. Our neighbour has gone on to become a major Japanese actress, very famous and a big, big celebrity. Her house is a huge fortress and we have never even laid eyes on her. When you do the call to introduce yourself to your neighbours, you get the maid in her case and that is it. So finally we had a chance to meet her and that was through the thoughtfulness of my wife’s friend to do that.
What are you doing to be thoughtful in business with your clients? What can you do for them? When you go into the meetings, be more formal than normal – it will be seen as polite. Australia is probably the casual capital of the universe. That is fine in Australia but Japan is different. How you sit, stand, walk, move, speak were all determined very rigorously in samurai days and many of those attributes have trickled down to today, as acceptable, polite behaviour.
All of this flies out the window however when you go out drinking together. It is extremely informal, but that is the correct environment for that activity and Japan doesn’t mix it together. The problem with a lot of informal countries like my own, is we tend to want to mix them together, to be informal when we should be trying to be formal. Don’t mix them up in Japan.
If you say “no” I want to do it my way, this is how I do it in my country, I am not going to be Japanese about this, then good luck with that approach. Let me know how that is working out for you! I wouldn’t recommend that. I suggest you try to be seen as polite in a Japanese context and that means being a lot more formal that normally would be the case in a business setting in your own country.
By the way, you will never be Japanese. Trust me. You will never be considered Japanese. But you will be considered polite from their point of view, their reference point, their cultural context. We have to be conscious of that and maybe up the formality levels a bit to fit in, at least during working hours. After work we are all champions of informality, so we have that part down already.
