When we are presenting, we can be mentally separating out personal selves from the content of the talk. There will be facts, data, statistics, details, examples, evidence, etc., which is all rather far removed from the individual presenting. It is almost like we are doing third person presentations rather than first person. Technical people, in particular, like to remove themselves from the proceedings and only talk about the facts. This is a big opportunity wasted.
I am an introvert, so I understand about the reluctance to inject oneself into the story. People who know me will be doubting that statement entirely. They will say I am outgoing, confident, vocal, not shy and retiring at all. The Myers Briggs personality analysis results define an introvert as someone who when they get tired, likes to retire from the fray, rest up and then return. The extrovert grabs energy from others and so wants to occupy the center of the fray. Following this split, I am a withdraw now to return refreshed later type.
As an introvert, talking about myself or my family was something that I was highly hesitant to do. In fact, I managed to give hundreds of public speeches, while safely keeping myself out of the narrative. I realise that this was a big mistake.
Now we don’t have to hang all the family’s dirty laundry out for all to see, but we can inject something of ourselves into the talk. We can refer to our experiences with a particular subject. We can tell stories of what happened to us when we did something we are recommending people to do or not to do. When we do that we make a very strong connection with the audience and with a sense of reality. Now the talk has moved from the theoretical to the practical.
We all want to know what the reality is. That is why we appreciate the opportunity to read consumer comments on products or services they have bought. We are looking to cut through all the company propaganda and get some sense of what is really going on. You Tube is full of videos of people reviewing products and commenting on their experiences with them. We love the chance to get more objective information before we make our purchase.
Well, audiences are the same. They want to know what really happened. This means if we can inject our experiences and insights into the presentation, the audience speaker credibility gauge starts to really move the needle in a very positive direction for us. To do this we have to be willing to share stories and episodes of what happened. Sometimes these are hard to relate because maybe we are not being shown in a perfect light.
The funny thing about audiences is that they don’t like people who are perfect. Too smooth, too polished, too slick comes across like a rat with a gold tooth. Your internal danger beacons starts flashing and the loudspeaker broadcast is telling you “danger, danger”. Our audience likes to hear about the struggles, foibles, mistakes and failings of others. They don’t regard these people as weaklings to be discarded on the mountainside like we have all read about in ancient Sparta. Instead they identify with our human frailties. They feel more able to relate to us.
Humour is tricky with presentations, but self-depreciating humour never goes down badly. I was watching one of the masters of sales presentations –_Zig Ziglar. He was relating his tough, early days in sales, going to host’s kitchens and cooking up a storm for the invited guests who were his prospects. In passing he casually mentioned that even though he was struggling early in his career he did sell quite a bit - his car, his furniture…. It was quite funny the way he told it and the joke was against himself, rather than against another person. This is the mark of a professional.
If we want to connect with our audience, we shouldn’t be afraid to poke fun at ourselves, tell of our failings, mistakes, disasters, train wrecks, etc. The audience will appreciate the honesty and also the peek inside about what not to do. It took me a long time to be able to do this, being an incredibly private person, raised in the isolation of the Australian bush. But when I did manage to start injecting more of myself into my talks, I found a stronger resonance with the audience and more acceptance of what I was saying. I realised I should have been doing this a lot earlier.
Try to find something about yourself you can include in the talk, related to what you learnt. We love the train wreck. If you say, “Let me tell you how I made ten million dollars”, we won’t be as interested as if you had said, “Let me tell you how I lost ten million dollars”. We really enjoy finding out what we should do to avoid disaster and you sharing yours, is much appreciated. So don’t be shy to talk about things that went off the rails, the meltdowns, the spontaneous combustions, the total disasters. Put yourself in the story and we will love you for it.
