Q: Why do bosses and team members so often misunderstand each other?
A: The issue is often not personality, but communication preference. People vary in how assertive they are and whether they focus more on people or on tasks. A boss may seem difficult when, in fact, they simply prefer a different way of receiving information and making decisions.
Mini-summary: Many workplace tensions come from style differences, not bad intent.
Q: What are the two key dimensions for reading a boss’s communication style?
A: The first dimension is assertion, ranging from low to high. This shows how strongly someone holds and states opinions. The second dimension is orientation, ranging from people focus to task focus. People-focused leaders pay close attention to how others feel. Task-focused leaders concentrate on outcomes, results, KPIs and getting the work done.
Mini-summary: Watch for how strongly they speak and whether they lean toward people or results.
Q: How should you communicate with an assertive, people-oriented boss?
A: This type is often energetic, persuasive and interested in influencing others. They usually respond better to big picture conversations than to gritty detail. If you lead with broad issues and overall direction, you are more likely to keep their attention and gain alignment.
Mini-summary: With this style, lead with the big picture rather than drowning them in detail.
Q: How should you communicate with the other three styles?
A: Detail-focused bosses want proof, data and precision, so micro detail builds trust. Assertive, task-driven bosses value speed and results, so be direct, confident and succinct. Less assertive, people-oriented bosses respond better when you slow down, speak gently and show awareness of how people will feel. By listening carefully to what your boss says and how they say it, you can adjust your style. The boss may not be difficult after all, just different.
Mini-summary: Match detail, speed or sensitivity to the style in front of you.
Dr Greg Story, Ph.D. in Japanese Decision-Making, is a veteran Japan CEO and trainer, author of multiple best-sellers and host of the Japan Business Mastery series. He leads leadership and presentation programmes at Dale Carnegie Training Tokyo.
