Paul summarizes a talk by Tara Brach named “Healing Addiction: De-Conditioning the Hungry Ghosts”
Addiction is addiction, it doesn’t matter what it is, it is applicable. Tara talks about the “hungry ghosts” of addiction. There is a sense that something is missing. A feeling that this moment does not contain enough happiness. How you live today is how you live the rest of your life. When we don’t have basic needs met, we reach out for a substitute. We must find a way to love ourselves.
Peri, with 81 days since her last drink, shares her story.
SHOW NOTES
[11:11] Paul Introduces Peri. I have been sober since May 8, 2016. I am a bartender, I live in Salt Lake City, Utah. I am a poet, and have been writing more in sobriety.
[12:58] Paul- Describe your drinking habits, how much did you used to drink?
Peri- I think by the end I was drinking 20-30 shots of whiskey a day, and 5 beers. I tried all types of rules with most of them meant to be broken. I think I started to derail when I was 17 years old. I knew by the time I was 21, I had a problem.
[16:13] Paul- Talk to us about some of the things you have had to change?
Peri- A big thing for me is friendships. Almost everyone I associated with drank like I did. I had to cut almost everyone out of my life. I had to start fresh like I knew no one in the city.
[20:19] Paul- You quit smoking and drinking at the same time, tell us about that?
Peri- I quit soda at the same time too. 5 aspirin and a large Coke used to get me through the hangovers. I had massive blood clots, so I had to quit both to avoid the health consequences.
[25:11] Paul- What’s on your bucket list in sobriety, what do you hope to accomplish?
Peri- Some days it is One Day at a time, others it is the moon. I am saving up for a truck, I would like to travel more. I would like to get off my blood thinners. Healing my body would be a huge moment for me.
[29:45] Paul- What do you do when you have the cravings?
Peri- I eat a lot of ice cream. Either Pistachio, or Peanut butter ice cream, sometimes Raspberry.
[35:27] Paul- How is it today? How are you on day 81?
Peri- I feel really great, doing an interview right now. Meeting up with my friends, having some dinner. I legitimately haven’t experienced a sober birthday in 10 years. I am looking forward to remembering it. I have been trying the meditation. I have been researching alcoholism. I have been pretty active in Café RE. Occasionally, I will go to AA, but only when I need an extra boost.
[37:30] Rapid Fire Round
What was your worst memory from drinking? I don’t know, there were a lot. I was hanging out with a shady group of people who had alcohol. I fell, and these people left me on a curb with a big gash on my head. Did you ever have an “oh-shit” moment? My last job I got fired from, because I was taking shots of alcohol in the bathroom before my shift. What’s your plan moving forward? I’m going to keep digging in; reading, writing, and it will all figure itself out. What’s your favorite resource in recovery? Café RE. I listen to the podcasts, but the Facebook group is great to describe what I am feeling, and have the communication with the group. What’s the best advice you’ve ever received (on sobriety)? Nothing worthwhile is ever easy. What parting piece of guidance can you give listeners who are in recovery or thinking about quitting drinking? Anything in your life that is a toxic influence, get rid of it. It is not conducive to your sobriety. You might be an alcoholic if you wake up on the sidewalk.
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Healing Addiction: De-Conditioning the Hungry Ghosts
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